024: Feb. 24th, 2009

Of all the pictures I have done in the almost month since starting this project this is sadly the easiest for me to do. That is because of what this day means to me. To give you a little back story, both my grandparents lived with my family from the time I was in about 2nd or 3rd grade until I was in college. My grandparents were older then most and had many health problem. My grandmother fell down the stairs so she was healing from many broken bones while my grandfather was in the early stages of Alzheimer's. So I grew up knowing them very well and having them in my day to day life was both amazing and the most stressful thing one could go thru. Being reminded everyday that one day that will be my parents is scary. Seeing my dad take care of his parents is scary. During college things got worse, in the summer of 2007 my grandmother passed away. She had been getting weaker by the day and we knew it was coming. I have never been the one to deal well with death. It scares me and I can barely even been in the same building that a funeral is in. But this picture is not about that. This is about my grandfather. I never got along well with my grandma but my grandpa, that is another story. He was the funniest person I knew. He was always smiling, playing jokes and sneaking snacks. But watching him slowly forget things was hard, having him ask me the same question about 10 times every 5 mins is hard. I had to act like this the first time you are asking me. Things just got worse and worse and after college I was working about 40+ hours a week. I was never able to go up there for holidays like New Years. Things got very bad very fast and I can remember hearing my parents fight that my brother needed to get down to NJ to see him because it was most likely the last time he would get to see his grandpa. I didn't get that chance. My parents saw him the weekend before and he kept saying he needed to get out to see Gary and George because they were there. But sadly they were in the room with him the whole time. That morning I know I woke up early for some odd reason only to have the phone ring moments later. I knew once it rang what had happened. They didn't have to say it I just knew. He had passed away. That week I wanted nothing more then to not think about what I had to do that weekend but it was there before I knew it. That 2 days is a blur of tears and fear. I remember sitting in the back corner and crying, holding my breath for the moment I knew that was going to happen. Having each group get up and say their last good-byes. Last time I held on for dear life to my younger brother and I knew I had to not. Walking up there with my brothers and cousin I lost it. Turning to see my Dad crying for the first time in the 22 years of knowing him killed me.

This is my grandpa when I was just under 1. I will always remember him as being right behind me no matter what. I am not sad that he is gone, because I am happy he has made me who I am. I will always miss him and feel blessed that I had him in my life.